September 27, 2010

Recently there had been many developments in my life that threatens to obscure, and for what it is, there has been many; I crashed my car last month in the slippery slopes at the foothills of genting – it is now declared a total loss, but if there were any blessings it was a volvo – I wasn’t at all hurt; the taxman wants money for not declaring income between 2001~05 (I was in Brazil) – my company just started mandatory deductions on my salary (but I’m scrambling for proof); some yet-to-be-verifiable news has started to emerge that may jeopardize my company’s operations in Malaysia, and I may need to fly soon for emergency meetings and damage control; and the one I love has slowly started to lose her mind, and there is nothing much I can do, for she has to overcome her own demons.

My troubles are many, and they assail me all at once; but they are not more than most people’s. I was asked if I thrived in adversity – no, I do not.  I trust that a correct path will naturally appear, but I do not wait for it to come – you should seek it.  There will be an infinite permutations of scenarios and actions going through your mind, sometimes permeating like a slow disease, and you must be mature, patient and confident enough to weed through those that are trivial, conjectures merely a product of doubt and fear. You must not be reactionary, for there is nothing worse than to run from an extreme event to another extreme choice made, often in the opposite direction. In clarity, undisturbed by exterior pressures, a pendulum settles to rest midpoint, personifying the eightfold way.

  • Right understanding,
  • Right thought,
  • Right speech,
  • Right action,
  • Right livelihood,
  • Right effort,
  • Right mindfulness and
  • Right concentration.

Lastly, you must have the strength of conviction that no matter how grey something is- a decision or a choice made, an action or a reaction, an emotion felt or incurred- that you have done something to remain true to your beliefs.

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